Cold War Borscht
“Received via shortwave at 3:47am. Broadcast has since gone silent”
Number stations are shortwave radio broadcasts that have transmitted encrypted messages across the globe since at least the First World War. They typically consist of numbers, letters, or words read aloud by a synthesized voice, preceded by a repeating tone or signal. Governments have never officially acknowledged their existence or purpose, though many researchers believe they are used to communicate with embedded agents operating in foreign countries. Among the most well known is UVB-76, called "The Buzzer." Since the late 1970s, UVB-76 has broadcast a continuous buzzing tone on frequency 4625 kHz, twenty four hours a day, without interruption or explanation. Occasionally the buzzing stops. A voice reads out names and numbers. Then it resumes. No government has ever commented. Researchers have noted that transmission activity increases during periods of geopolitical tension. The station has never gone silent. One persistent theory is that UVB-76 functions as a dead man's switch. Should it ever go permanently silent, pre-programmed retaliatory measures would trigger automatically. On October 4th, 1983, the station briefly deviated from its standard format and transmitted what appeared to be a complete borscht recipe. The transmission lasted eleven minutes and has never been repeated. No explanation has been offered. It is not known who it was intended for. Borscht has sustained Eastern Europeans through wars, famines, and the collapse of governments for centuries. It is a dish of endurance. The Buzzer is still transmitting.
Ingredients:
4 medium beets, peeled and grated
3 medium potatoes, cubed
2 carrots, grated
1 medium onion, diced
¼ head of cabbage, shredded
3 cloves garlic, minced
2 tbsp tomato paste
1 tbsp white vinegar
6 cups beef broth
2 tbsp olive oil
Salt and pepper to taste
Sour cream and fresh dill, to serve
Instructions:
Heat olive oil in a large pot over medium heat. Sauté onion and carrots until softened, about 5 minutes.
Add beets. Cook another 5 minutes. Add garlic and tomato paste. Stir. The color will concern you. This is normal.
Pour in the broth. Add potatoes and cabbage. Bring to a boil, then reduce to a simmer for 25 minutes.
Add vinegar. Season with salt and pepper. Taste. Adjust.
Serve hot with a dollop of sour cream and fresh dill.
Do not attempt to locate the original broadcast.
Serves 6. Or fewer, depending on who shows up.
Conclusion
The Buzzer is still transmitting. It has not explained itself.